Hash Wedding weekend

Hash Wedding weekend

Monday, 31 August 2015

Hash Trash - Run 187

Run: 187
Date: Sunday 23rd August 2015
Location: Turgutreis
Hares: Shitter & Butt Butt
Scribe: Culture Vulture

Another fine day and this time we were blessed with the attendance of our beloved GM, Hose Handler.  As it seems that he will not be a regular attendee for some while yet, he announced some temporary changes to the Hash Mismanagement.  Culture Vulture will stand in as GM and Barrel will stand in as RA.  Additionally, Noddy will work together with Long Willy on Hashadabbery.  Having then braved the dust clouds (great choice of RV hares!) he immediately handed over to Culture Vulture and gratefully (it seemed) stepped out of the circle.

CV brought in the hares to deliver the usual pack of lies, awarded the Down-Down for first home last run to Luvjoy, annouced that unless there were any volunteers (there weren’t, of course) he would scribe the run.  He then handed over to Barrel as RA who seemed totally unprepared for the occasion, but then maybe not – just a charade.  ON-ON called and the masses –all 17 of us – surged(?) forward.

The trail was up to the usual expectation of lies from the hares including the non-existence of a hook.  A couple of safety hazards – barbed wire and markings on the wrong side of a main road – which were well noted and rewarded later.  The pack was completely confused at the end of the trail when the RV had upped and gone a further few hundred metres on – at least it was dust free there.  Before calling the closing circle, we waited while King Crapper checked out that part of the trail that we had apparently all short-cutted.  Thus he was the only one to complete the whole trail.  Well done and first home King Crapper.

CV then belatedly opened the circle calling the hares for the usual abuse and Down-Down.  Next Hose Handler as returnee, and then Long Willy’s friend Kristina as Hash Virgin.  Just before handing over to the RA, the GM appropriately awarded him his Bodrum Hash 50th run tankard.  Another one for his collection of Hash mugs.

The RA had a fistful of Down-Downs in store for us.  First of all the new (albeit temporary) Mis-management.  Then a well-deserved Down-Down for King Crapper, for going back to complete the trail and keep us all waiting for our Hash Nectar.  Birthday wishes to Hose Handler and Fishy Fingers followed, and then the hares castigated for their Health and Safety hazards mentioned earlier.  Barrel then called in Kristina, today’s Virgin, to test her powers of memory.  Every one announced their Hash Names and then she was requested to repeat them (but not before we had all, of course, moved around).  Unfortunately she totally failed and Long Willy, who had brought her along, successfully managed to complete the task for her.  There was then a classic Down-Down to Muffin Muncher for casually calling to the RA during the run “Hey Barrel, what is your Hash Name?”  The RA then called in all the apparent walking wounded – those hashers with dodgy knees, ankles, backs etc.  Luvjoy joined this crowd and when asked why he said he had a dodgy dick!  Next Down-Down was for the forgetful who had not got their Hash mugs (the RA himself saved purely because he had just been awarded a new one).  One or two more Down-Downs for what, I cannot remember, and then the call for the ON-ON-ON at the Değirmen Restaurant in Dereköy – only 10 km away!!

A great day - thanks to all.

Culture Vulture

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